Friday, April 1, 2011

Great New Product

Warning -- Satire -- April Fool's Post

 Do you feel sad sometimes? Are you tired when you get up in the morning? Do you get winded running sprint intervals? I've just found a great new product that I think can help. It's called bozolol.

Bozolol is an amazing nutritional supplement extracted from the bozolol berry, harvested wild in the heart of the Amazon rainforest. To the native Ilotaca tribe, the bozolol berry is sacred because it alters the molecules in your brain to make you smarter AND sexier.

Here's how it works: bozolol actually increases the uptake of fat-soluble vitamins from your food, while reducing inflammation in the arteries and helping you shed fat faster than a pork roast! Guaranteed! Learn more about it here. 

April fools!
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22 comments:

  1. arnoudApril 1, 2009 at 7:32 AM

    Great product! It also has helped many people, in early trials, to reduce arterial calcification to levels below what is detectable (Full clinical trials are underway).

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  2. Christian MasonApril 1, 2009 at 7:36 AM

    Excellent! I forgot what day it was. It's certainly time for me to order a case of this stuff!

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  3. Robert Andrew BrownApril 1, 2009 at 7:41 AM

    Thanks Stephan for all your hard work.

    It must work. They say laughter is the best medicine. (-:

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  4. RaynaApril 1, 2009 at 8:06 AM

    I wonder if it would be possible to make paleo pancakes using these bozolol berries. I mean, if it'll make me sexier and smarter, I have to try it! I bet I can order them on amazon. I'm going to go check now!

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  5. UnknownApril 1, 2009 at 8:09 AM

    Lifts my mood much faster than Acai.

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  6. Robert M.April 1, 2009 at 8:38 AM

    Instruction on proper cleaning of your sinuses after you finish your world-record set of sprint intervals after taking bozolol:

    www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQm7YpxgOnA

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  7. FitnaticApril 1, 2009 at 9:21 AM

    I use it and it has transformed me! I lost fifty pounds, may hair grew a foot and now I have perfect teeth!
    thanks for spreading the message!

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  8. arnoudApril 1, 2009 at 10:01 AM

    Stephan,

    thank you for digging up this information. I tried to place an order for a few more bottles, but I was informed it is now on backorder until the next harvest season.

    What do you think might be the mechanism for the beneficial effects of bozolol? I heard Big Pharm is challenging the assertion that it removes all serum LDL.

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  9. AnonymousApril 1, 2009 at 10:14 AM

    "Do you feel sad sometimes? Are you tired when you get up in the morning? Do you get winded running sprint intervals?"

    Ha, this was perfect! Thanks for the laugh...

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  10. Aaron BlaisdellApril 1, 2009 at 10:18 AM

    I would try it, but I'm afraid it would stain my teeth.

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  11. JesseApril 1, 2009 at 10:52 AM

    bozolol will never give you up, never let you down, never run around and desert you.

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  12. mtflightApril 1, 2009 at 11:20 AM

    The true mechanism by which bozol works may be its inhibition of phytic acid, me thinks.

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  13. xApril 1, 2009 at 11:45 AM

    Excellent! They don't make men like that anymore... sigh!

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  14. R K @ Health Matters To MeApril 1, 2009 at 1:26 PM

    What convinced me is how the initially skeptical bartender in the video benefitted greatly from bozolol.

    Did you see that flip he did? Good lord, there's something to this stuff!!!

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  15. AnonymousApril 1, 2009 at 1:30 PM

    Admit it people, you watched until the end of the vid.

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  16. Stan BleszynskiApril 1, 2009 at 2:19 PM

    Reminds me of "Combustol", a pill to prevent spontaneous human combustion.
    8-:)

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  17. Bryan - oz4casterApril 1, 2009 at 6:36 PM

    A little dancing is good exercise :)

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  18. Stephan GuyenetApril 1, 2009 at 9:20 PM

    Arnoud,

    Yeah apparently Pfizer is coming out with a synthetic version so they're trying to smear the original. Of course, the Ilotaca tribe isn't going to see any royalty money...

    Todd,

    I won't lie to you, I watched the whole thing and my foot was tapping.

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  19. NickApril 1, 2009 at 11:05 PM

    As the cop said, "give the money to bozolol!"

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  20. NickApril 1, 2009 at 11:05 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  21. UnknownApril 2, 2009 at 10:21 AM

    Warning: side effects may include nausea, disorientation, increased irritability, painful sensation in eyes and ears, depression, birth defects in babies and in some cases impotence. Patients should not operate heavy machinery or dance while taking Bozolol.

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  22. UnknownMarch 31, 2012 at 12:05 PM

    Okay, you got me! Just remember that many people don't get mad, they get EVEN!LOL

    ReplyDelete

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