Friday, April 1, 2011

Great New Product

Warning -- Satire -- April Fool's Post

Do you feel sad sometimes? Are you tired when you get up in the morning? Do you get winded running sprint intervals? I've just found a great new product that I think can help. It's called bozolol.

Bozolol is an amazing nutritional supplement extracted from the bozolol berry, harvested wild in the heart of the Amazon rainforest. To the native Ilotaca tribe, the bozolol berry is sacred because it alters the molecules in your brain to make you smarter AND sexier.

Here's how it works: bozolol actually
increases the uptake of fat-soluble vitamins from your food, while reducing inflammation in the arteries and helping you shed fat faster than a pork roast! Guaranteed! Learn more about it here

April fools!

22 comments:

arnoud said...

Great product! It also has helped many people, in early trials, to reduce arterial calcification to levels below what is detectable (Full clinical trials are underway).

cmason said...

Excellent! I forgot what day it was. It's certainly time for me to order a case of this stuff!

Robert Andrew Brown said...

Thanks Stephan for all your hard work.

It must work. They say laughter is the best medicine. (-:

Rayna said...

I wonder if it would be possible to make paleo pancakes using these bozolol berries. I mean, if it'll make me sexier and smarter, I have to try it! I bet I can order them on amazon. I'm going to go check now!

B said...

Lifts my mood much faster than Acai.

Robert M. said...

Instruction on proper cleaning of your sinuses after you finish your world-record set of sprint intervals after taking bozolol:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQm7YpxgOnA

P said...

I use it and it has transformed me! I lost fifty pounds, may hair grew a foot and now I have perfect teeth!
thanks for spreading the message!

arnoud said...

Stephan,

thank you for digging up this information. I tried to place an order for a few more bottles, but I was informed it is now on backorder until the next harvest season.

What do you think might be the mechanism for the beneficial effects of bozolol? I heard Big Pharm is challenging the assertion that it removes all serum LDL.

US Food Trends said...

"Do you feel sad sometimes? Are you tired when you get up in the morning? Do you get winded running sprint intervals?"

Ha, this was perfect! Thanks for the laugh...

Aaron Blaisdell said...

I would try it, but I'm afraid it would stain my teeth.

Jesse said...

bozolol will never give you up, never let you down, never run around and desert you.

mtflight said...

The true mechanism by which bozol works may be its inhibition of phytic acid, me thinks.

Amanda said...

Excellent! They don't make men like that anymore... sigh!

Ryan Koch said...

What convinced me is how the initially skeptical bartender in the video benefitted greatly from bozolol.

Did you see that flip he did? Good lord, there's something to this stuff!!!

toddhargrove said...

Admit it people, you watched until the end of the vid.

Stan (Heretic) said...

Reminds me of "Combustol", a pill to prevent spontaneous human combustion.
8-:)

Bryan - oz4caster said...

A little dancing is good exercise :)

Stephan said...

Arnoud,

Yeah apparently Pfizer is coming out with a synthetic version so they're trying to smear the original. Of course, the Ilotaca tribe isn't going to see any royalty money...

Todd,

I won't lie to you, I watched the whole thing and my foot was tapping.

bogartg1 said...

As the cop said, "give the money to bozolol!"

bogartg1 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
reid said...

Warning: side effects may include nausea, disorientation, increased irritability, painful sensation in eyes and ears, depression, birth defects in babies and in some cases impotence. Patients should not operate heavy machinery or dance while taking Bozolol.

Nance said...

Okay, you got me! Just remember that many people don't get mad, they get EVEN!LOL